Roast Yourself Challenge

I watched a video, wherein Ryan Higa roasted himself. Today, I’m taking this opportunity to do that. I’m too narcissistic. I need this.

I’m such an angsty kid. Oh, and I’m so fat, like why? I’m so sarcastic, people don’t even take compliments from me. I hate to be given advice. I don’t appreciate anything, and I look like I’m giving up on life. I’m so realistic,  that it’s almost like pessimism.  For me, life is a major sorcery. I take rejections all the time. I believe that everything is about me. I’m a stuck-up kid. Oh, and I’m not some very pretty-looking person. My voice is so high-pitched and flat, that I sound like an eleven year old kid,  when I’m going to turn 16. I’m so narcissistic, as if I achieved something great in life.

Now, I challenge you to roast yourself, because we diss so many people everyday. We often forget how many flaws we have. Roasting yourself is as important as praising yourself. If you have superiority complex, you need this. Also, you must know where you stand.

I challenge the following people:
1.Nudge Wink Report
2.Shonessa
3.Abby Has Issues
4.The Annual

And those of you, who are reading,  join the party!

Aspects of a clichéd Korean Drama

Hey, are you scrolling down? Why? Because you don’t like Korean dramas? Well, I ain’t promoting any. When did I ever promote anyone but myself (I can be so narcissistic sometimes)? I’m gonna diss the way dramas are made. There are a few aspects clichéd dramas have, and these dramas are always overrated God-knows-why.

1.The Incompetent Leading Lady

In every clichéd drama, the leading lady is incompetent.  This is more prevalent in the case of teen dramas, where the girl is dumb and she’s like the biggest dork in class. If the leading lady is smart, she’s really, really studious. She’s like those clichéd nerds, who wear thick glasses, keep on studying at their desks, don’t socialize with other kids, and suck at sports. This girl is crazy about the hottie or let’s say Kingka of the school. She has very low self- esteem.

2. The Kingka

The most popular guy in school, a.k.a, the Kingka, is the most desirable guy. He’s cold and has a killer emo/rebel look. The girls love him, and the guys consider him to be the “real man”. He walks in with his gang, and has a facial expression, which says “I didn’t choose thug life, thug life chose me” or “could I be anymore stud?”. Now, this guy is bound to fall in love with the incompetent leading lady, who nobody notices in school. I really don’t understand this. Does she blend in with walls and the furniture in her class or what?

3. The Ugly Best Friend

The leading lady might be pretty and all, but her friend must be ugly or dorky. But, this friend is the most supportive.

4. The Nice Boy who gets ditched

There’s always this nice guy who treats the leading lady with respect.  He’s way better than the Kingka, because he treats her way better than him. But, I don’t know, why girls like bad guys. The leading lady always gets this guy’s heart broken.

5. Being a maid

The leading lady somehow forces herself into slavery for the Kingka, and it always the girl who’s the maid. The Kingka makes her do menial jobs for him. And, they fall in love as usual.

6. Mean Girls

These plastic, fake girls are always pestering the leading lady. The leader is dating the Kingka, and she doesn’t want him to date the leading lady.

Now, I don’t understand how people ship the main girl with the bad guy. I would want her to be with the nice guy, who gets ditched all the time. And why does your heart beat so fast, when the leading lady and the Kingka have a “moment”? It’s kind of ridiculous.

If I had to create my own drama, these would be the aspects.

1. The Overachieving Leading Lady

This girl would be good at everything.  She would be the president of the Student Council.  She would get good grades, have a sports cred, and maybe even, be a guitarist in the school band. She would have a killer personality. She would have high self- esteem and confidence. Guys would go head-over- heels for her, and girls would admire her. She would be the ideal Queenka.

2. The Nice Guy who falls for the Queenka

The nice guy falls in love with the Queenka, and they end up together!

3. The Hella Awesome Friend

She would be considered awesome and she’s as good as the leading lady.

4. Mean Boys

Why do girls always fight amongst themselves?  They don’t! The mean boys hate the leading lady. Her success hurts their ego. And one of the boys falls for her,  because hell yeah.

My drama would be a hit, I guess. It’s good to stand out.

Urban Legends

In a world, where people believe in all kinds of rumours and myths. Urban legends and conspiracy theories have always gone viral. Most urban legends are created out of a set of theories made up by really analytical people, who were part of some kind of cult, or maybe some person with a lot of free time in his hands.

Last night, my friends and I had been looking for Japanese urban legends, because they’re really popular. My friend talked about this website titled “Scary for Kids” (their punchline was “And for adults too”).

So, we read about this Face Slit Woman or Kuchisake Onna. She will ask you randomly on the street, if she’s pretty or not. Prior to that question, she takes of her mask, revealing her creepy slit mouth. It is slit from the sides. If you say ‘no’, you die (obviously). You can say that she looks normal,  because then that will confuse her, and she won’t haunt you. She also appears in Korea. I think, she’s spreading a moral message telling people not to be so judgemental. Also, South Korea is known as the plastic surgery capital of the world. That woman is a trailblazer.

Then, you have Tomino’s Hell poem. If you read it out aloud in Japanese, you die or worse, you go insane. It was a poem mentioned in this book titled “The Heart is a Rolling Stone”. You can read it in your mind. I really didn’t understand it. It was metaphorical. There is a YouTube video with this creepy picture and the audio. Listen to it, at your own risk. It is very scary.

Then, you have this poltergeist named The Bald Man or Ganbari Nyudo in Japanese. He’s a perverted old man who loves to pry at young girls in bathrooms and bedrooms.  If you say his name out aloud, his face will be stuck to your bathroom window, and drools a lot.

Then, you have the forbidden Cow Head story. I wouldn’t mention it here. It’s absolutely traumatic.

However,  the comments were hilarious. For the story of the Tripping Bathroom, a person had suggested to shuffle feet to avoid the tripping, and for the Bald Man, someone had written, and I quote this comedic genius:

MY KINDA MAN!

Then, there’s this urban legend, which isn’t Japanese, about a pale woman who applied a lot of tanning lotions and went for a lot tanning apointments to salon. Because of the excessive lotion and tanning, she had apparently cooked herself. 
I quote another comedic genius on the internet:

Roast organs! New dish!

The comments always kill the eerie atmosphere. However, you find people with crazy theories of their own. Also, Japan has the craziest, scariest urban legends, high suicide rates, suicide apartments, crazy perv cases, crazy obsessions, and haunted high schools. And so does Korea… Also, there are so many bathroom ghosts.

Humanities Class

I chose Humanities. I love my class. We know our stuff. We discuss reality. We want to change our society.  I like that. I don’t hate the Science class. The thing is, people think Science students are smart. I believe that Humanities students know what’s happening around them. They are aware. Science students often want to rebel. They know they can’t. They don’t have  the guts. Commerce students are rebels. They like rebel against anything and everything. The Humanities students are revolutionaries. They have apt reasons to support their argument. Commerce students have a lot of free time. Science students are wannabe rebels. They think, teenage rebellion is a rad thing. Revolutionaries plan out their rebellion. And, they have good causea behind them. Rebels just rebel. Their rebellion can be unreasonable. This is the difference between rebels and revolutionaries.

Sing

(THIS IS TODAY’S DAILY POST WRITING PROMPT)

Singing regularly can keep your voice younger.  This is a health tip I read on TIME magazine. I’m a good singer. However, people consider me more as a writer than a singer. I have auditioned, and been rejected. I was also part of a choir once in my life. And, now I’m in a brass band. Yes, I play the trumpet.

Talking about singing, let me take first generation kpop idol, Bada into consideration. During the IMF Financial Crisis in Korea, when most people lost their houses and filed for bankruptcy, young Bada had to live on the streets. She, then, auditioned for SM Entertainment, which I have mentioned earlier in one of my posts. In 1996, she debuted as a member of the legendary girl group, S.E.S. Then, we have BoA, who has been gaining popularity in the US (if you’re from the US and don’t know her, it’s okay. You’re not living under a rock). Young Kwon Boa was scouted as a trainee by SM. Her parents didn’t want her to train, but Boa’s determination and talent moved them. In 2000, at the age of 13, she debuted as a solo artiste. Today, she’s one of the most respected people in the Korean entertainment industry.

I think, that people who can sing can heal the world. I believe that Beyonce can heal the world. It doesn’t matter, if you’re tone-deaf. Taemin of  SHINee (Korean boy band) was also tone-deaf and was a terrible singer. Today, he’s known for his improved vocals.

I’m Back

After a long hiatus, because of board exams, I’m back.
I’m back with new hope and evaluation anxiety, because my results are gonna be released.

Although,  I have good news. I’m going to be interviewed by Young Germany, a segment from the Deutschland Magazin again.

image

I had been interviewed previously at Menschen Bewegen 2016.

Witness Protection

(THIS IS TODAY’S DAILY POST WRITING PROMPT)

I’m scared of heights, because I have a heart condition, and I get serious motion sickness. Not that I throw up, but, I start shivering a lot, my vision blurs, and my chest aches. So, I won’t talk about bungee jumping or roller coasters here.

Public speaking is something that I’m used to. But, I go through stage anxiety before I have to sing onstage. That time, I prefer to be surrounded by strangers, because, my friends have goofy expressions most of the time. Plus, I can grow my fanbase beyond just my friends.

Can’t Stand Me

I can’t stand listening to my voice or watching my own video.
I record song covers (video and audio).
Whenever I watch my own videos, I feel like I have high levels to actually how unattractive I am. It sucks really. My voice is very high-pitched. I’m fifteen now, but I sound like I’m twelve.
I wanted to start video blogging this year, but I guess I should stick to writing, because my looks aren’t very appealing. Plus, I have no expressions on my face most of the time. My face is as inexpressive as a pumpkin. I don’t look approachable and sociable, but I am. I wanted to do standup comedy on YouTube. Perhaps I’m good with deadpan humor (at least that’s what people say).

Huh Gak, a Korean ballad singer, says, that he can’t stand listening to his own voice. But, that helps him to improve with every performance.

Can you stand listening to your own voice recording or watching your own video?

The Year That Wasn’t-What Could Have Happened For Good But Didn’t

Since I am a teenager, I will only talk about teenagers in this case. Also, I’m from India. Since, India is a third world country. Here, we’ll be dealing with problems that teenagers from the third world face.

  • It’s about time our education system got its shit back together. And, that is, whether or not to detain students. If you’re from the US, let me tell you that here kids aren’t given probation or anything. I think CBSE (Google it) is hoodwinking us. They said they’re making things easier for us. But, every time they change something, teachers become more and more vicious.
  • Teachers get their shit back together. Teachers do everything at the last moment. And, they can be so disorganized. This only makes them look barbaric. I’m sorry. extra classes in this windy winter sucks. Thank goodness, we don’t have blizzards here. Teachers here don’t say “all the best” before the exams. Instead, they say “You can’t do it” or “it’s gonna be very difficult”. Basically, they discourage us, instead of encouraging us.
  • Teenagers are also disorganized. Pulling all-nighters and cramming stuff only ruins your schedule. Get organized. I get it. Teachers can be disorganized, vicious and barbaric (that’s so Indian!). But, you can manage your time.
  • School sucks.
  • Life sucks.
  • Relationships suck.
  • 70 per cent of Indian teenagers commit suicide because exam pressure.

 

Now, let’s talk about what could have happened for good.

  • CBSE gave up CCE (Google it) system. Banned teachers from giving students stupid assignments instead. Schools now have a probation period for kids who don’t do well.
  • Teachers don’t spread negativity anymore, and are more organized.
  • Teenagers are more organized, and don’t fall into depression.
  • School is fun.
  • Life is awesome.
  • Relationships….. I dunno.
  • Indian parents and teachers start taking depression seriously, because kids who commit suicide, don’t die because they killed themselves, but because you didn’t listen to them. So, you can do the math hereon.

 

2015 could have been game-changer for many of the third world teenagers. If you’re an Indian teenager reading this, you need to give yourself a lot credit for all the third world problems you faced, and have been facing.